Perfectionism: Will I Ever Feel Good Enough?
Therapy for adults who give so much and try so hard… and still Feel Like they don’t measure up.
In Columbus, Ohio and throughout Ohio & Michigan (virtually)
You’ve spent years trying to figure it out.
Hoping that if you just do more, you’ll finally feel okay.
But the feeling never lasts for long.
And lately, you’ve started to wonder:
Is life really meant to be this way — all doing, no living?
What if the way forward isn’t about pushing harder...
but about learning to trust that just being is good enough?
You’ve Been Carrying So Much.
You’re warm, highly driven, always thinking one step ahead.
You smile. You show up. You check all the boxes.
You’re deeply kind — a giver, a loyal friend, a good listener.
You rarely ask for anything in return and often don’t receive it — but when you do, your realize, “I’d rather handle it on my own.”
You appear to have it all together - you’re on top of things.
But…
Behind the Scenes, You’re Working Overtime —
Constantly scanning for improvements or reassurance.
Always rushing. Never resting.
You’re mind is loud —
Full of self-doubt, comparison, and trying to stay on top of an endless to-do list.
Does anyone really see me? Value me? Or even like me? I am not funny enough. I am not thin enough. I am not interesting enough. I am not successful enough. Am I a good enough (daughter, wife, mom, friend)?
Does anyone really see me? Value me? Or even like me? I am not funny enough. I am not thin enough. I am not interesting enough. I am not successful enough. Am I a good enough (daughter, wife, mom, friend)?
It takes real effort to quiet the noise enough to be comfortably present and composed.
And no matter how much you accomplish, it never feels like you’ve arrived.
You feel overwhelmed.
Stretched thin.
And you’re quietly thinking: Something’s missing.
You May Not Have Always Called It “Not Good Enough.”
You just knew that following the rules, being the best, being kind, or staying mistake‑free felt best.
It also earned approval at times.
Or at the least helped you avoid criticism.
What You’ve Learned:
That inner voice? It’s very familiar.
It echoes messages of growing up with high expectations.
Or cold silences, snarky remarks, or only being noticed if you excelled.
Good wasn’t enough—you had to be exceptional to be seen.
And if you messed up? It felt like death.
The Role You Played:
You were the good one. The easy one.
It was unspoken—but you got the message.
You stayed out of trouble. You stayed out of the way. You took up little space — and came out when congratulated.
You understood the assignment.
But Now?
That old role is starting to wear thin.
It feels less like strength—and more like survival.
Like holding your breath.
And underneath it all,
The loneliness—so familiar—still waits.
You’ve Tried Everything To Feel Calm:
The self-help books.
The yoga.
The deep breathing.
The morning runs.
The organized spreadsheet.
The color-coded planner.
They help — for a moment.
But they don’t heal.
Because It’s Not About Doing More.
It’s about learning how to BE.
Without guilt.
Without pressure.
Without needing to earn your place.
To take up space — without apologizing.
To speak freely — with calm in your body.
To feel like yourself — without wondering if you’re enough.
To live like you belong — because you already do.
How Therapy Can Help
Therapy can help you shift from constantly managing everything around you —
to start showing up for yourself.
It’s a shift from controlling your world — to finally caring for your inner one.
How You’ll Transform:
You’ll begin noticing what triggers the inner critic. And learn to respond with awareness instead of urgency.
You’ll unpack the messages you inherited — and decide whether they still belong to you.
You’ll practice feeling okay after a mistake — not defined by it.
You’ll stop measuring your worth by what you produce.
Instead of over-functioning, you’ll pause.
Instead of pushing through, you’ll listen inward.
You’ll start to hear your own voice — more clearly.
You’ll begin choosing based on your values — not others’ expectations.
You’ll say no without guilt.
You’ll speak up without rehearsing every word.
And you’ll begin to build a sense of worth rooted in the goals from your heart —
not someone else’s version of who you should be.
Lasting change takes time and courage.
It will take a willingness to stay with the process — even when it’s hard.
And with each step, you’ll start to realize:
It’s not about doing life perfectly.
It is about being present — Leading your own life.
Being the author of your own story.
Let’s Get Started Already!
You don’t have to come to therapy prepared—or even know where to begin.
You can show up overwhelmed, uncertain, or messy.
I’ll meet you right there.
For once, you don’t have to do it all by yourself.
How Will This Be Different Than The Other Therapies You’ve Tried:
I use powerful trauma-informed approaches including EMDR and NARM — for deep, lasting change.
They go beyond surface-level “tools”, catharsis, or quick fixes.
They help you gently explore the beliefs and patterns that formed early in childhood and still shape you today.
With EMDR:
We process stuck memories and beliefs at the root — like “I’m not good enough” or “I have to keep accomplishing to stay connected.”
This work supports change at a nervous system level. So those beliefs start to loosen their grip and no longer dictate your sense of worth or safety.
With NARM
We explore how strategies like perfectionism, shaming, or the habit of staying small were adaptive ways you learned to survive in childhood. This is less about reliving the past — and more about noticing how those patterns still show up now, even in real time. Then, we gently making space for a new way of being so that you can live more authentically in your adult life.
What Sessions Could Look Like:
We will look at what you are most wanting for yourself — and what is getting in the way of obtaining that.
Some days, we may explore memories that still shape how you move through the world.
Other times, we’ll focus on present relationships, boundaries, or the inner critic that won’t let up.
I’ll listen closely—not just to your words, but to what’s underneath them.
I might pause us, rewind, slow things down, or gently ask: “What are you noticing as you say that?”
We won’t just talk about your patterns and obstacles.
We’ll notice them as they unfold, in real time, and what’s there when they soften.
(SPOILER: It is usually what you are most wanting!)
What You Might Experience:
Some sessions are going to feel heavy - you’ll want to log off and immediately take a nap with your dog, or binge watch your favorite show.
Other days, something clicks — things begin to make more sense, leaving you energized.
Some bring clarity and relief.
And others will leave you feeling lighter, with more peace - reminding you that you wished you started years ago.
Therapy with me isn’t about fixing you —
because you’re not broken.
It’s about reconnecting to the self that’s been buried under all the pressure.
